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05 July 2017

Kscope17, it's a wrap

So  much fun.  Too much fun?  Is that possible?  Maybe, but probably not.

OMG, again and again and again I promise myself that I won’t do what I did which is try to do too much all at the same time but I’m frankly greedy.  And lazy.  We all know the second is true but the first?  Gluttony in the name of coffee and Kscope are pretty much it.

Kscope is without doubt the peak of my professional year.  Who knows, it might be the peak of my personal year but that would be sad so I won’t admit it except in the dark recesses of my heart when I lay awake in bed, staring at the ceiling, realizing the futility of Man, the comedy of life, my profound sense of ennui, and the eventual entropy death of the universe.  But then all I need do is think of ODTUG and Kscope and all is right with the world.  It’s that good.

Wrapping up Kscope17

Sleep?  What’s that?

I didn’t get much of it.

It’s all about the people

From the hippie Australian (and fellow co-presenter) to the crazy bag lady (yeah, Natalie, I’m looking at you), what makes Kscope so special are my colleagues and friends that I largely only get to see once a year.  

Moving shopping for Natalie and my 10th Kscope anniversary we arrive at the Essbase aka Oracle Analytic Cloud session on Sunday.  Standing (or sitting) room only suggests it’s a popular thing.  Of course yr. obt. svt. was in the front row because he’s sad, sad, sad.  Seriously, this started when I was a uni student – I figured and continue to figure is that if I show up, I ought to get the most for my money.  Also, I can hear better that way.

Dinner in the beginning but I’m not sure when

In Asia (or very often everywhere else in the world) there’s what’s called the Asian “Yeah!” when being photographed via what looks like the peace sign.  Yeah, yeah, a stereotype, but go query the Great Googly Moogly and you’ll see I’m right.

NB – Stock photo I swiped of the interwebs.

But that isn’t the only context that Man (or in the above snapshot, Woman) flashes the V sign.

V For Victory?

Do something physically impossible to yourself?

Damn Commie hippies and yet the Coolest Man in Hollywood?

Or “Peace, baby” in a booking photo?  Say “Cheese” for the nice policeman taking your booking picture.

Dunno for sure, but I’d go with the first.  

Hand gestures, but not the V

From left to right we have Pete Nitschke, Rodrigo Radkte de Souza, Jessica Cordova, Celvin Kattookaran, Ricardo Gampaoli, and…bugger, I’ve forgotten his name.  So much for the theme of people, people, people unless The Man Without a Name is acceptable.

This is in the bar at the speaker meeting.  Notice that none of us are drinking.  If I were there it would be a nice glass of milk although I soon broke this All American goodness.

Three very misguided women

Ghadia, Alexsandra, and Jazmin came up to me and thanked me for the work I do for the community.  What work?  I was so gobsmacked by these thanks that I thought it best to capture it on film (heh, the 21st century’s equivalent to film) and so I got them to post ‘cos, “Pictures or it didn’t happen”,

Note the chap on the left who is absolutely amazed that they’re thanking me for…I dunno, but something.  J/k, they were thanking me for the drivel that is this blog.  I told you they were delusional.

Back to the presentations and the people

Here’s my buddy Joe Aultman beginning his Groovy and Calculation Manager presentation.

And Celvin doing the same in a different session.  Groovy is groovy.

Speaking of delusional, here’s newly minted Oracle ACE Gary Adashek.  Despite Gary’s questionable taste in dress, he made it to ACE, leapfrogging over ACE Associate which is proof positive if proof be needed that he is pretty awesome.  And has a strange love of trains.

My former boss, Tracy McMullen is moderating the Planning ACE Lunch n’ Learn.  She still talks to me so there’s proof that forgiveness is possible in this lifetime.  OTOH, perhaps she’s remembering our time not all that long ago as Tracy is shooting one of those “Could-these-eyes-actually-launch-little-daggers-if-I-really-really-tried?” looks at me.  So maybe forgiveness isn’t in the cards.

Jake Turrell and (this won’t be a surprise if you look below) my Blog Bro, Celvin Kattookaran were my co-panelists.

The Women In Technology lunch.  I enjoyed being the token male at my table and having my Favorite Customer Ever, Amy Dailey, sitting to my left.  At least she wasn’t cruel to me.  I kid, I kid, I really enjoy the lunch as I can take criticism.  Also, I think I agreed with all of what was said.  It’s a good event.

Is this the Kscope Wednesday night special event?  Surely, yes.  Look at those suits – snazzy.  Look at the ladies’ frocks – beautiful.  Highballs and cocktail glasses and of course the witty repartee that Kscope is well known for – what could be more elegant?  And dancing.  Surely ODTUG’s members are much the same.

I’m the Junior Executive type talking to the blonde.

Is this what the DJ spun up at the Wednesday night event?


In 2017 we have the below.

Would you believe that those dancers aren’t proud ODTUG members?  Neither would I.

Hah!  See, I told you I was the elegant (ahem) guy talking to a blonde woman.  Here’s Alexsandra and Yours Truly.

The Kremlin for the after party?  Isn’t that what people used to try very hard to leave?  Perhaps this is the Lubyanka?

It’s all winding down now.  Here’s Celvin and his lovely family.  Note that Blog Bro has a smile on his face as does everyone else.

I’m not the only one who finds them adorable.  Here’s my new bestie, Neviana Zhgaba contemplating a Federal offence.  Don’t do it Neviana, no matter how cute she is.
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What would a conference be if not capped off by an enourmous amount (3 lbs. worth if you’re wondering) cinnamon roll?

Here are the sad faces of the prediabetic.  From left to right that’s Joe Aultman, Tim German, and Pete Nitschke.
Danny Bryant and Joe Aultman again.  They are practicing that strange modern practice of photographing their food.  Food is for eating, fellas.  Oh, how did I get a snap of the roll?  ‘Cos I’m a hypocrite, that’s how.

Here’s Pete Nitschke and Opal Alapat.  This must be after the Giant Bun as they are smiling and are thus on a sugar high.

Sort of amazing

Kscope has many facets:  charitable work via the community service day, education, many teaching moments, and networking like you’ve never seen it before, and lastly partying.  It’s quite the seductive mix which is why I come back year after year.

Yeah, a humble brag ahead, but I and my copresenters (and I think all presenters) spend hundreds of hours working on our presentations.  It’s hard graft but worth it because it means I go to what is obviously The Greatest Oracle Conference Anywhere.

And yet it has a cost.  As I showed in the beginning of this post, I didn’t get a whole lot of sleep.  I wasn’t the only one.

Q:  What does Kscope make you crave?  A:  Sleep.


‘Nuff said.

And with that,adieu

What can be more relaxing than a meadow on a hike post conference.  Here’s a lovely meadow towards the end of one of my favorite trails in – would you believe – New Jersey.  From Perth Amboy (not the most salubrious town in America) to this.  Truly a state of contrasts.

There are many people I haven’t mentioned.  To all of you, thank you for making Kscope truly the height of my professional year.  There’s nothing to touch it.

Be seeing you in Orlando at Kscope18.

28 June 2017

Kscope17, day 2, part 1, and a happy annoucement

I am moved to song

It’s true, it’s really true.  But when something wonderful happens, I simply have a song in my heart.

And what, Cameron, what makes you write this?  What oh what oh what?

Because Gary Adashek is now an Oracle ACE!  

Does he deserve it?  Yes.  Does he deserve to be teased mercilessly about his strange love for the product that was key in his advancement (beyond his intelligence, hard work, conscientiousness, and general awesomeness)?  Even more yes.  Is he completely unafraid to look like a complete goof in his heartfelt approach to helping others?  Even more than more yes.  

And look at him.  And don’t laugh.  Too much.  Although I certainly am.  A lot.
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Where’s his choo-choo?

Ah, here it is.  

But what time is it?
1893?  19-ought-3?

The face of a dedicated man, and not incidentally, an Oracle ACE.

Time for that song

^^^Really, you need to listen to this old advertisement unless you’re over the age of 60 (I’m not, btw, no matter what you think).  It’s all good.

Once upon a time there was an Essbase-er,
Gary Ad-a-shek was his monik-er,
He oddly loved Smart View though we don’t know why,
He used enthus-iasm to make the rest of us cry

Gary says…“Hate the Essbase add-in”!
Gary says…“Love the new replacement”!
Gary says…”Smart View is the best”!
Gary says…”Now that I’m ACE, I’ll have to give it a rest”!

It’s with love, Gary, with love.  

For originalists

Choo-Choo Charlie was an engineer,
Choo-Choo Charlie had a train we hear,
He had an engine and it sure was fun,
He used good n plenty candy to make the train run.

Charlie says...”Love my Good ‘n Plenty”!
Charlie says...”Really rings my bell”!
Charlie says...”Love my Good ‘n Plenty”!
It’s Good ‘n Plenty candy that I love so well!

The best part

All kidding aside, and knowing that I’ll never work in Tin Pan Alley, this is a well deserved recognition.

Thank you, ACE program – you chose wisely.

Thank you , Gary, for all you do for the Oracle EPM community.

Be seeing you.

27 June 2017

Kscope 17, day 1, part 2

OMG, I’m already exhausted
I’m not sure anyone could tell the difference (or indeed, care) that after the first full day, I am already at 3 ½ hours of sleep.  It isn’t going to get better.  And yet, Gentle Reader, here is Yr. Obt., Fthl., & Most Hmbl. Svt. tip tapping away with my usual drivel.  Into every life some rain must fall on your (not mine) head.

So, Cameron, what did you do yesterday evening?

If I didn’t have Twitter, I’d never know, using the theory of “Pictures or it didn’t happen”.  Hoo-boy, it was busy.

Check out yesterday’s post for detail up the evening community entertainment.  I am semi-ashamed to admit that I went to the BI, not the EPM, event.  Why, Cameron, why?  ‘Cos I got to see this:

This isn’t the last surprising Gabby snap.  Read on…

Embarrassing photos aside, the event was fantastic and were just pipped to 1st place (it was a pub quiz with a Texas flavor) by those !@#$ing cowboys.  Bastards.

Cameron and Natalie’s EPM meetup

This is the 10th anniversary of my bestie Natalie Delamar.  ODTUG Madame President went all out as usual with a party.  It was amazing.  Thank you, Ride or Die Girl.  It’s been quite a trip, and one I wouldn’t have missed for anything.

Here’s a picture of the layout.  Amazing, Natalie.  I can’t figure out how you have time to do all that you do.

It was a hopping party.

Dan Keith, Amy Dailey, Tim German, Celvin Kattkooran’s forehead (I am not going to pursue a career as a photographer), and Tim German.

Here I am with my buds Amy Dailey and Natalie.

The real surprise.

Who knew that Gabby Rubin moonlights as a barman?  The drinks he made were amazing.  Incredble.  Awesome.  Thank you so much, Gabby.

All for now

I’ll try, maybe, to get today’s events in.  Follow my Twitter feed for up to date information.

Be seeing you.

26 June 2017

Kscope17, day 1

Here we go!

It is now the first true, real, honest to goodness day of the conference.  I’m so excited.  I’m also kind ofreally, really, really sad, so there is that.

I have five pictures; that means 5,000 words I don’t need to type

Here’s Danny Bryant, brand new Oracle ACE Director.  I was privileged to announce his enboblementappointment.  Seriously, I was happy to act as a reference and beyond happy to announce it.

Disneyworld is Kscope18’s destination!

My co-presenter on tomorrow’s Oracle Analytics Cloud/Essbase presentation, Tim German looking…interesting.

Celvin Kattookaran, my younger-smarter-taller brother from totally different parents about to boggle my mind about Groovy and Essbase calcs.  He did.

My other smarter-brother-from-totally-different parents, Glenn Schwartzberg, who is at least shorter and older than Yr. Obt. Svt., espousing the virtues of Essbase in Oracle Anayltics Cloud.

There will be more to come

It might not happen till tomorrow, but it’s coming.

Be seeing you.

25 June 2017

Kscope17, day 0

No, not Year 0, but the day before Kscope proper kicks off.
How I wish I could tell you what Oracle has told us.
But I can’t.  Seriously, Oracle embargoed us on Tweeting, blogging, etc. about what they discuss, reveal, and review.  Does that stop Yr. Obt. Svt.?  Yes.  Does it stop others?  No.  You’ll have to decide who is the wiser.

But what you can do is follow me on Twitter as I retweet others.  I think this means that I am an accomplice after the fact which, were this a court of law (I am an unbelievably huge fan of The Sweeny if you’re looking for a good police procedural), that would be enough to send me off to hard porridge.  As I’m not before the bar, I’m going to throw myself on the mercy of the Oracle court.

Follow me on @CameronLackpour to get the latest.  I’ll do my best to update this blog as the day goes on but it’s difficult to keep up.  Also, as I become more and more sleep deprived not only will the quality of these posts decrease but the delay between X happened and I report it even in the same day becomes more and more unlikely.

So that’s an incentive for you to follow these daily posts.  Or not.

So what have you managed to accomplish today?

Attend the Sunday symposiums.  How, how, how I’d like to be able to literally split myself between the Dodeca symposium, the EPM symposium, and the Essbase symposium and the room is packed.  As you can see, it's not just Standing Room Only but there are people sitting on the floor.
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The latter is where I am right now.  As Tim German and I are presenting on Essbase cloud on Tuesday, I am happy to see that we haven’t as yet (only halfway through Gabby Rubin’s session) gotten anything wrong.

Stick around

The best is yet to come.  I’ll update as possible.

Be seeing you,